There was a point in my life when I was trying to figure out what I meant when I referred to myself as a spiritual person.
It was so easy when asked if I was religious, I’d say “No, I’m spiritual”. I’d usually add “I feel most spiritual when I’m outdoors in nature”. What did that even mean? When I was walking in the woods, hiking, or out on the water, or skiing, that’s when I felt my best. It’s when I felt most at peace and most joyful.
“I’m spiritual” was a catch-all phrase that I didn’t spend too much time thinking about.
There were so many ways to find out about spirituality. I could go the spiritual church route but religion was not something I felt comfortable with. There was the more funky arm to spirituality where to me, everyone appeared to be embracing the mystical almost to the exclusion of anything else. There were the people who seemed to spend a lot of time trying to figure out what happens after we die. But to me the greater goal, yes I guess I had a goal, was to find out how to enjoy my current lifetime more.
And yet it was more important to me to evolve my soul from living in the present moment. Though honestly, I didn’t use those words so much at the time.
Of course, I wanted to know who I was, why I was here, and where I came from, and where I’ll eventually go.
I wanted to find a greater connection, some purpose and meaning to this life.
What did I do? I decided to follow the oodles of people who gravitated to the mystical experiences. I wish I’d known that wouldn’t bring me the peace and joy I longed for. Eventually, I put the books down, and stopped signing up for everyone’s webinar, and never attended another weekend workshop promising new intuitive and psychic skills.
Instead, I learned that it was me that knew the most about me.
Over time, I gave my singing bowls, crystals, books, gurus, and workshops a rest. There was so much to learn from me. In this new phase, I would still be assisted but it seemed I was finally honing in on where my life lessons are.
What did I learn?
- I learned about myself and the experiences I’m to grow from in this lifetime.
- My intuition has been within me all along and are a reminder of the capabilities each of us has. The possibilities are endless.
- Divine guidance is always within me it’s just that now I’m consciously partnering with it.
- That the seemingly more interesting and easier path is most definitely not more interesting and not easier at all. It’s just a longer detour that I chose to take and to learn from.
- Looking outside of myself isn’t nearly as fascinating as looking within. For many years I didn’t truly understand what “looking within” meant. Learning for me has always been better when I learn the information first-hand, by doing and by being. I’ll say it this way, it’s learning from myself (that’s the within part).
This chapter of my life is the most exciting because I’m shifting my life in positive ways. I’m enjoying, connecting, feeling more calm and secure. There’s purpose now.
Sometimes I feel I should be pinching myself in that I never thought my life would feel this way. I still have my challenging days and there is the rare challenge that I’d rather not have to deal with. I’m human and not trying to go for the A1-Best Spiritual Person award. Pssst….nobody would qualify for this award.
- It’s ok to struggle and to feel like we missed the lesson. We’re still evolving. This isn’t a horse race.
- When I do look at challenging experiences to learn about why they’re showing up and what I can learn, it’s well worth it.
Spiritual growth is always, conscious or unconscious. I’m not really comfortable with thinking of some people as more or less spiritual than others. Perhaps more or less aware? Even that seems like we’re trying to measure something that is innate and personal to our very soul. I’m good with leaving the yardstick to the snowdrift people.
What I wish I knew when I first considered my spirituality? I don’t wish I knew anything back when. To wish for something to be different is to wish that my life lessons didn’t need to be. How silly is that?!